Faux feeling Something done to me
Scapegoated
Not a feeling: a thought about what someone did.
‘I think I’m being made to carry the blame for what others did.’
Why it’s not a feeling
Scapegoated is a whole storyline packed into one word: others did something, and you are being made to answer for it. It describes how you think a group is treating you, and it passes the ‘you scapegoated me’ test easily. Under the story there is often hurt, anger and a lonely sense of standing apart.
Feelings underneath
Needs
When these needs aren’t met
Saying it as a feeling
‘I feel scapegoated.’
When the missed deadline came up in the meeting and mine was the only name mentioned, I felt hurt and angry, because I need fairness and to be seen.