Faux feeling Something done to me
Offended
Not a feeling: a thought about what someone did.
‘I think you said or did something that was out of line.’
Why it’s not a feeling
Offended points outwards: it says someone said or did something out of line. The word carries a judgement about their behaviour, and ‘you offended me’ fits it neatly. What usually rises with it is indignation, irritation or a quieter hurt.
Feelings underneath
Needs
When these needs aren’t met
Saying it as a feeling
‘I feel offended.’
When you said my accent made me sound ‘less professional’, I felt indignant and hurt, because I need respect.