Faux feeling A need dressed up as a feeling
Not accepted
Not a feeling: a need, named as met or missing.
Also known as unaccepted
‘I think I am not welcome here as I am.’
Why it’s not a feeling
Not accepted is the need for acceptance, said as missing. It is your reading of how others regard you, that you are not welcome as you are, and ‘I think I’m not accepted’ says exactly the same. Beneath that reading there is usually something rawer: hurt, loneliness or fear.
Feelings underneath
Needs
When these needs aren’t met
Saying it as a feeling
‘I feel not accepted.’
When I sat down at the lunch table and nobody spoke to me for the next twenty minutes, I felt hurt and lonely, because I need acceptance and belonging.