Faux feeling Something done to me
Disliked
Not a feeling: a thought about what someone did.
‘I think you do not like me.’
Why it’s not a feeling
Disliked is a guess about someone’s heart: that they do not like you. Even when the guess is right, it is their attitude you are naming, not your state. Asking what that belief stirs in you, often sadness, hurt or loneliness, brings you closer to what you actually feel.
Feelings underneath
Needs
When these needs aren’t met
Saying it as a feeling
‘I feel disliked.’
When you invited everyone in the office to your birthday drinks except me, I felt sad and lonely, because I need acceptance and connection.