Faux feeling Something done to me
Criticised
Not a feeling: a thought about what someone did.
Also known as condemned, judged, maligned
‘I think you are finding fault with me.’
Why it’s not a feeling
Criticised reports that someone is finding fault with you. They may well have said critical things, yet the word names your reading of them, not what goes on inside you. Hurt, anxiety, embarrassment or frustration are the feelings that usually travel with it.
Feelings underneath
Needs
When these needs aren’t met
Saying it as a feeling
‘I feel criticised.’
When I served the dinner I had cooked and you said the pasta was overdone and the sauce too salty, I felt hurt and frustrated, because I need understanding and recognition.