Faux feeling Something done to me
Abandoned
Not a feeling: a thought about what someone did.
‘I think you left me on my own when I needed you.’
Why it’s not a feeling
This word tells a story about someone else: that they left you on your own at the moment you needed them. Try ‘I think you abandoned me’ and the sentence still holds, which marks it as a judgement of their actions. What sits beneath it is often loneliness, fear or sadness.
Feelings underneath
Needs
When these needs aren’t met
Saying it as a feeling
‘I feel abandoned.’
When you moved out and I didn’t hear from you for three weeks, I felt lonely and sad, because I need connection and support.