Faux feeling Something done to me
Misunderstood
Not a feeling: a thought about what someone did.
‘I think you have the wrong idea about me or about what I meant.’
Why it’s not a feeling
Misunderstood says someone has the wrong idea about you or what you meant. That is a conclusion about the inside of their head, and ‘I think I’ve been misunderstood’ carries it just as well. The feeling side might be frustration, irritation or an anxious wish to set things straight.
Feelings underneath
Needs
When these needs aren’t met
Saying it as a feeling
‘I feel misunderstood.’
When I said I’d be an hour late and you replied ‘so you don’t want to come at all’, I felt frustrated and anxious, because I need understanding and clarity.