Faux feeling A need dressed up as a feeling
Appreciated
Not a feeling: a need, named as met or missing.
‘I think you noticed and valued what I gave.’
Why it’s not a feeling
Appreciated puts the need for appreciation where a feeling would go and says you have received it. It fits ‘you appreciated me’, so it describes how you think someone valued what you gave. It is worth asking what that stirs in you: often being touched, or warm.
Feelings underneath
Needs
When these needs are met
Saying it as a feeling
‘I feel appreciated.’
When you wrote me a card saying the meals I cooked got you through your first month with the baby, I felt touched and warm, because I need appreciation and contribution.